This is the blog section!!


This is be a place where I will just rant about random shit in my life, it genuinely wont be that interesting so you dont have to read it if you dont wanna

22/02/25 - Alone (2)
I really just feel exactly like my last blog update, but I thought I should update the blog anyway.
Losing more sleep too, I feel too overwhelmed with my thoughts to sleep. I really just want someone to care, anyone really, Im so tired. I want to cry, sleep, scream and slam my head into a wall all at the same at this point. I guess Im getting a little more schoolwork done as a distraction though, been a little more motivated to draw too. Ah with that thought I should finally work on my art page on this website
10/02/25 - Alone
Been feeling a little lonely recently, quite a bit more than usual. Sometimes I think its my fault for not talking to my friends enough or initiating conversation enough, but Im just too tired to do so. Please dont get me wrong, I love my friends to the moon and back, but I can barely find any motivation to leave my bed and Im just getting more and more tired.
Id like someone to care for me a little, if thats alright to ask, maybe a hug or something would be nice.
28/01/25 - Image
I always thought, that just maybe, I wasnt actually very fat and I was just imagining it or something... I cant seem to lose weight, because I keep eating to deal with stress and it just makes me even more stressed. Sports isnt helping either, as its only once a week for an hour, the rest of the time Im just rotting in my room. I dont want others to see me, I want to be invisible or something, but thats not realistic and we all know that.
I feel disgusting in my own body, I hate how I look.
13/01/25 - Empty, tired
Ive recently started distancing myself from my friends, I cant get myself to have simple conversations because I just cannot match their energy levels. I feel bad, dont get me wrong, but I just cant get myself to engage in their conversations any longer, especially online. It feels strangely nice, not really relying on anyone for joy or anything anymore. Though it feels a bit lonely sometimes I guess. Im just not able to talk to them anymore, I feel like Ill be shutting them out more in the future.
But maybe its a good thing?
8/1/25 - (not) Special
Ive always been considered a second, or last choice and I hate it. I always put my best effort in friendships, I genuinely want to talk to people, when Im with my friends I am a very lively person. At least, I try to be. But literally once Im alone I start feeling absolutely horrible, like everyone in the world hates me or something, and at times I believe it. I hate that I believe it but sometimes I get so overwhelmed with emotions that I dont have a choice. But will I tell anyone? Ofcourse not, just you, the person reading this, whoever you are. Im incredibly insecure, I dont like talking about my feelings or just myself in general. Thats why I made this website: to put all the things I am so incredibly ashamed of in one space.
I dont want to feel hated, I just want to be loved.
5/1/25 - Care
 Thought Id get at least my first entry down before I start SCHOOL again...
Recently, for some reason, Ive been more motivated to do certain things like taking care of my physical health. For months Ive struggled to do simple hygiene tasks because I just couldnt find any reason to; if I did the bare minimum I would be okay, right? WRONG.
Im trying to pull myself out of this slump bit by bit, taking care of my skin more or doing small things such as brushing my teeth and wearing my mouth guard when going to bed. Im really proud of myself for completing these tasks, even though they might seem small and simple.

Next step: taking care of school work too!! (hopefully)